Beyond Symptom Relief: Why Avoiding Wells Doesn't Produce Fruit

There are really two reasons why we do any behavior, two fundamental orientations that underlie every single action we take. Think about something you've done today: getting out of bed, making breakfast, or talking to someone at work. Every behavior is either done because we're trying to move towards something important to us, or to move away from something we don't want, something uncomfortable or undesirable.

Even something as simple as brushing your teeth can have one of these orientations. We might brush our teeth because we want to move towards good dental hygiene and white teeth, or because we want to avoid decay, disease, or the pain of toothache. Sometimes it's both.

The point is this: every behavior can have one of these two orientations. But here's what matters, the two are not equal when it comes to their effect on our lives.

The Fruit Tree and the Well

The Fruit Tree and the Well: A Story About Orientation

Imagine you're walking through a field one day. In the distance, you see your favorite fruit growing on a tree or vine. Someone comes up beside you and asks, "What do you want to do right now?" Most likely, you'll say, "I want to move towards that fruit tree. I want to get some fruit." That's a towards move.

Now imagine a completely different scenario. You're still in a field, but you've fallen into a well, a deep well of water where you're treading to stay afloat. That same person appears and asks, "What would you like right now?"

Pretty sure that in that moment, you're not going to say, "I'd like some fruit." Most people will say, "I want a rope to get me out of this well!"

And that makes complete sense. Getting out of wells should be prioritized over moving towards fruit trees in that particular moment.

When the Mind Overrides What Matters

So what does this highlight? The mind tends to override towards moves in the presence of threats. If there's imminent danger, the mind will prioritize escaping that danger before it thinks about moving towards something important or valued.

While this makes complete sense when we're talking about literal threats, crocodiles, snakes, fires, or actual wells, it doesn't make as much sense in our internal world.

Here's the problem: the mind doesn't distinguish very well between external threats and internal ones.

Internal threats might be things like fear of judgment or criticism, fear of letting people down or being rejected. They might be feelings like anxiety, sadness, or vulnerability. They might be experiences like uncertainty, unpredictability, or uncontrollability. All of these can become internal threats that we've learned to avoid.

The mind's setting to override towards moves and prioritize away moves means that in the presence of any of these internal threats, we still seek to avoid them before we move towards what matters in life.

The Catch: We Can't Actually Escape Internal Wells

If it were possible to actually escape these internal threats permanently, there probably wouldn't be a huge problem with prioritizing avoidance. But here's the catch: all the things we might do to try and escape or avoid these uncomfortable feelings never actually work to eliminate them for good.

Think about it. We might avoid fear of judgment by not going to a social gathering. We might avoid unpredictability by endlessly researching and scrolling through information to understand something as much as possible. But what we know is that the next social gathering, the next challenge we face, these feelings will arise again.

If our only way of handling uncertainty or fear of judgment is to avoid or escape it, we spend a significant proportion of our lives trying to avoid what we fear rather than pursue what we value, love, and care about.

The reality is this: avoiding what we don't want doesn't produce what we do want.

Avoiding wells doesn't produce fruit. Trying to eliminate darkness doesn't produce light. And escaping the feelings we fear doesn't produce the life we want.

Why The Harvest Clinic Exists: More Than Symptom Relief

The Harvest Clinic name itself was built on the idea that good mental health means so much more than the escape or avoidance of painful emotions.

A lot of psychologists today are being trained in models and approaches that seek to reduce symptoms, in other words, reduce difficult feelings. But what we believe as a clinic is that a rich and full life comes with a rich and full range of emotions. If we want to live richly and fully, we need to learn a different way to handle internal wells, these uncomfortable experiences, other than simply trying to escape them.

Why? Because one, we never really escape them permanently. And two, the more we try to escape them, the smaller our life becomes and the less time we have to pursue the things that actually matter.

The concept of "harvest" is built on the idea that rather than simply helping people feel less bad, we want to produce more rich fruit in people's lives.

What This Means for Your Life

So where does this leave you? If you recognize yourself in this pattern, spending more time avoiding internal wells than moving towards what you value, there's another way forward.

It involves:

• Defining what the fruit is for you, what truly matters in your life

• Learning ways to handle internal wells like anxiety, self-doubt, fears of judgment, uncertainty, and vulnerability

• Discovering how to carry these experiences without letting them dictate your choices

• Prioritizing what you want to move towards rather than what you're trying to escape

This isn't about eliminating difficult feelings. It's about learning to move towards what matters even when those feelings are present.

An Invitation to Something Different

If this resonates with you, we would love to invite you to connect with our team. Our psychologists are passionate about helping people define what fruit they want to move towards in life and learn ways to handle the internal wells that inevitably come with living fully.

We hope that this year will be one where, by the end of 2026, you can see even small progressions towards the values that matter most to you, not because you've eliminated all discomfort, but because you've learned to carry it while moving towards what truly matters.

Ready to move beyond symptom relief and towards a richer, fuller life? Book a session with one of our psychologists today and discover what it means to harvest the fruit that matters most to you.

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