A few weeks ago, a client told me something that stopped me in my tracks: "I don't even know what I want anymore. I've spent so long avoiding what I don't want that I've lost track of what I do want."

I spent years thinking I had my life together. I worked out religiously, ate well, maintained a busy social calendar, and kept my apartment spotless. From the outside, I looked like someone who really had their priorities straight. There was just one problem: almost everything I was doing was driven by fear.

Last month, I had a choice: attend a networking event or stay home and catch up on work. On paper, both could be justified. Networking is "good for business." Catching up on work is "being responsible."